


Words

by taggianto



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Angst, Derogatory slang, Explicit Language, Homophobic Language, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-20
Updated: 2012-05-20
Packaged: 2017-11-05 16:34:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,314
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/408594
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/taggianto/pseuds/taggianto
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Something has Sebastian upset.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Words

Sebastian crashed through the entrance of the flat, Jim following close behind. As soon as the door was closed, he slammed his fist into the wall with a roar. Jim was wide-eyed. “Bastian… Bastian calm down…” He started to approach Sebastian, but hesitated when he saw the look on his face.

Sebastian’s breathing was ragged as his forehead fell against the wall. “I’m... I’m not mad at you, love… I just…” He let out a pained sigh. “I just need some space right now.” And with that, he turned and marched down the long hallway, unable to bring himself to face Jim. He went through the door to the basement stairs and slammed it closed behind him.

He hit the landing at the bottom of the stairs full force, ripped his suit jacket and shirt off and threw them against the wall, leaving just the black tank top he wore under everything. The basement was dark, the only light coming from the tiny windows that filtered in the glow from the street. He didn’t bother to switch on any of the bare bulbs that hung from the ceiling as he passed his workbench and gun racks. He headed straight for the heavy bag that hung from a hook in one of the rafters and attacked.

He pounded his fists into the worn leather over and over and over, and each time he connected, the words rang out in his head.

_Faggot. Poufter. Queer. Bender. Fag._

Uppercut, hook, _jab, jab, jab._

There were tears in the corners of his eyes now, but he didn’t stop. It hurt too much, he couldn’t handle it… he just kept slamming his fists into the bag again and again and again, pouring out all his aggression and anger and _pain_.

It was their anniversary, for fuck’s sake. And for once, Jim had suggested they go out. Together. Not as Boss and Employee, but as Jim and Sebastian. He’d made reservations, even bought Sebastian the new suit jacket that was currently crumpled in a heap on the dusty basement floor.

Right straight, hook, hammerfist, _jab._

The food had been wonderful, the wine Jim had ordered was exquisite, but they could have been eating fish and chips and knocking it back with soft drinks for all Sebastian cared. He was just happy to be out with his lover. _Out_ with his lover. For once, Jim was as free with his little touches as he was when they were at home. He’d taken Sebastian’s hand as they gave their orders, he’d smiled and laughed. God, that laugh. Sebastian was _his_ and Jim was making sure the world knew it.

With a cry of frustration, Sebastian spun around and slammed a heel kick into the heavy bag. He staggered backwards and slid down against the wall, burying his head in stinging hands.

They’d elected to walk home after dinner. It was a nice night. Jim had slipped his hand into Sebastian’s as they strolled along, interlocking their fingers. Sebastian had felt like a giddy teenage boy out on his first date.

Everything changed with the first shout. Those words rang out – mixed with drunken laughter – as a group of men cornered them on a side street. They’d been followed out of the restaurant, apparently. Sebastian was content to shrug it off with a snide remark – he’d been called far, far worse – but Jim’s hand had immediately dropped from his and he’d felt him shrink away.

Sebastian had taken one look at his lover’s face and felt his heart shatter. Sebastian had been dealing with these sorts of insults all his life, so he sometimes forgot that Jim hadn’t. Jim looked lost, he looked small. The jeering group picked up on this immediately, focusing their verbal attack on the man at Sebastian’s side.

_Take it up the arse, do you? I bet you do. You’re a pretty little homo, I bet he fucks you, yeah? Fucks you like the little bender you are._

Sebastian’s vision had gone red. He’d advanced on the group, shouting something, at some point he’d taken out his knife. He couldn’t even remember what he’d said, but it must have been effective. The group turned tail and left, still hurtling insults in their retreat.

Sebastian had been vibrating with rage the rest of the way back to the flat.

He let the tears come now as he crouched in the dark basement, clutching his legs to his chest, head buried in his knees. He just couldn’t stop seeing Jim’s face. The world’s greatest criminal mind had been broken by a group of drunken, homophobic _assholes_ and it was all because of Sebastian and his stupid need for stupid affection and it was all his fault and _fuck_ why did it have to be so complicated?

Some minutes later, he heard a soft knock on the basement door and a slight creak as it opened. “Sebastian?” Jim called down, cautiously.

Sebastian drew in a few deep breaths, trying to calm the spasms in his chest. “Yeah, babe,” he answered finally, voice still thick.

He kept his head down and listened as Jim descended the stairs and made his way over to where Sebastian sat. Jim slid down beside him and nudged his arm with something warm. “Here.”

Sebastian looked up, then took one of the mugs that Jim held. “…thanks.”

They drank their tea in silence. After a moment, Jim started to speak. “Listen, I’m sorry about –”

Sebastian cut him off. “Don’t apologize. This is my fault.”

“The fuck it is. Look at me, Bastian.” Suddenly angry, Jim took Sebastian’s chin in his hand, raising his head. “This is nobody’s fault but those ignorant _fucks_ who decided we were an easy target. A mistake I doubt they’ll be making again anytime soon.”

Sebastian arched his eyebrows. “You mean…”

“Acquisition team should be moving in shortly.”

“Jim, you can’t just murder everyone who shouts homophobic slurs at us. Well, I mean technically you _can_ , but still…”

“Who said anything about murder?” Jim asked with a cheeky little grin, anger dissipating. “No no no, that would be far too much effort for the likes of them. They’ll just be taught a… lesson.”

“Jesus Christ, Jim.” Sebastian started to laugh, but it morphed into a choked cough. He drew in another deep breath and tried to relax.

After a few more sips of his tea, Jim set his mug on the ground with a sigh and reached into his pocket. “Look,” he started. “We paid enough for these and seeing as it’s our, y’know, anniversary and all…” he nudged Sebastian’s shoulder and held his out his hand.

The small platinum band in his palm shone in the dim light of the basement and matched the ring Jim had on his own finger. Sebastian was taken aback. Jim _never_ wore his ring. Ever. He hadn’t even worn it three years ago on the day he’d dragged Sebastian down to the registrar, ranting about tax benefits and hospital visitation rights.

Jim took Sebastian’s hand and slipped the ring onto his finger, careful to avoid the bruises forming on Sebastian’s knuckles. “Now don’t get any ideas. I’m not suddenly going to start wearing this all the time but…” He trailed off, running his fingers over the smooth band of precious metal. When he spoke again it was in a quiet murmur and he kept his eyes averted. “It… this means something to me, okay? I know I’m not good with… well, with any of this but I need you to know…” He trailed off again, frustrated he couldn’t find the right words.

Sebastian wrapped his arm around Jim’s shoulders and pulled him close. “It’s okay… I know, love. I know.”

Jim sighed into Sebastian’s chest. “Happy anniversary, Bastian.”

It was Sebastian’s turn to lift Jim’s chin as he pulled him in for a kiss. “Happy anniversary, Jim.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to the ever lovely [hannah_baker](http://archiveofourown.org/users/hannah_baker) (for helping me to de-awkwardify everything. And for giving me rings feels in the first place. And fangirling with me over fluffy Mormor.)


End file.
